I used to see it all the time as a Kindermusik educator, parents who loved and cared for their child, probably more than they loved breathing and yet who had almost no idea of the best way to manage the child. From the outside it's almost pantomime: look out behind you! The audience is shrieking it, but the characters tread blindly on.
In any relationship, each person brings their needs and their vulnerabilities to any interaction. The more we feel, it sometimes seems to me, the stupider we become.
I experience this sensation from time to time in my marriage for example. I have a certain reputation for emotional and social insight. In many professional roles I worked with individuals who had a reputation for being 'difficult'. It goes away if my husband and I have a disagreement. Not every time (or we wouldn't still be married). I know this man intimately, and we've been married for nearly 20 years, but it's still hit and miss with me when it comes to managing discord in our relationship.
So, if anyone knows a sure fire way to tell when you're being clues up or clueless, please do write in. I think we could all use the help.
This is post 56 of 100 posts in 100 days.